Having “that talk” may be scary, emotional, and challenging. However, delaying the talk some other time may leave you without pre-planning. Here are some tips if you are considering speaking with your loved ones about assisted living.
If you have brothers and sisters, talk about the option of assisted living with them first.
Your future preparation for your aging parents may differ in your mind from your brothers and sisters. Be sure you all can agree or discover ways to discuss your disagreements before you bring the subject up to your parents. If differences are robust and you cannot hold a healthy discussion, include a social worker in the conversations. An unbiased 3rd party often can bring resolution.
Bring up the subject before you are forced to
Pre-planning permits you to control the scenario, the direction, and the setting of the conversation. If you can, pick a time when a network of friends or family is on-hand and when those involved are relaxed and happy. Honest dialogue when everybody is not feeling stress or immediacy permits your aging relative or parent to offer their feelings on the topic. It is a dialogue instead of a directive.
Be prepared to revisit conversations more than one time
Your initial crack at it may not be successful. Even simply imagining not being well enough or getting too old to live on your own is a frightening consideration. That initial conversation might be the ball that gets a lengthy process rolling. Be ready to ride it out.
Have all options in mind
If your loved ones or parents are ready to browse brochures, or tour facilities, have the addresses, websites, and materials prepared. Being included in the decision might make your dad or mom feel better about the ultimate move.
Be prepared to talk about the financial element of assisted living.
Do you have any idea of your parent’s financial circumstances? Have your parents planned ahead of time for long-term senior care, or is there a budget for day-to-day living costs? Personal finances are–unique, and talking about the checkbook, investments, and savings account–or a lack thereof–might produce friction. If you can, involve an expert in fiduciary matters or a financial coach.
Enter the conversation with an informed yet open mind
If the aim includes convincing your parent(s) to move into an assisted living facility, be willing to discuss the pros and cons. Perhaps it never has to mow the lawn or shovel snow again; have warm, tasty meals cooked every day; meet new pals, or be involved in classes or social activities they had given up. The security of an on-site healthcare staff may be attractive if declining health is a problem. On the flip side, listen to how your dad or mom feels about the subject and show that you understand–and attempt to understand! – their point of view.
For any other questions about assisted living, contact Optimum Personal Care today at 281.565.4144.